I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
