North Korea, Best Korea!
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I need to align my fucking chakras
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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