Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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