I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
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All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
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You pole danced in your parka.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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