I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
