marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize