so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize