So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
stop calling my apartment porn island.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize