is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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