I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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