i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
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its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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