She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
