i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Randomize