Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
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