Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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