Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
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Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
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It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.