the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize