Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
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