If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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