dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I've blown a few things in my day
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
