Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
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