people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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