If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Randomize
