suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize