sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
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