Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
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Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
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You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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