I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
