Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
