I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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