I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Randomize