Pappa wants mamma naked
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
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