question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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