beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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