But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
