somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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