we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
