? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
