Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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