it wasn't lemon gatorade
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
