my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
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