Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
I don't think brook has ever known best
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
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