so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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