you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
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I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
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Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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