Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees http://tfl.nu/26hp
  Replies (43) Good night (3105) Bad night (1031)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize http://tfl.nu/jvbl
  Replies (19) Good night (7428) Bad night (1112)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate. http://tfl.nu/oa41
  Replies (22) Good night (1151) Bad night (4460)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy http://tfl.nu/16kg
  Replies (12) Good night (1033) Bad night (3077)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  There's always time for handjobs

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (573): There's always time for handjobs http://tfl.nu/m1ol
  Replies (13) Good night (2693) Bad night (736)
• Favorite

  (417): View more from Missouri

  She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (417): She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round. http://tfl.nu/klhn
  Replies (3) Good night (1957) Bad night (726)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached. http://tfl.nu/gtou
  Replies (3) Good night (1668) Bad night (1114)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.

  (1-479): View more from Arkansas

  That's practically a relationship for you

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (479): Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week. (1-479): That's practically a relationship for you http://tfl.nu/hhkc
  Replies (26) Good night (2025) Bad night (1058)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.

  (1-717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error. (1-717): Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening. http://tfl.nu/753x
  Replies (8) Good night (2415) Bad night (626)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face. http://tfl.nu/y5ia
  Replies (11) Good night (1615) Bad night (897)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (718): I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch" http://tfl.nu/8il5
  Replies (10) Good night (1352) Bad night (501)
• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (323): but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA" http://tfl.nu/kezs
  Replies (2) Good night (761) Bad night (423)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I almost fell asleep reading that.

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I almost fell asleep fucking it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (405): No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora. (405): I almost fell asleep reading that. (405): I almost fell asleep fucking it. http://tfl.nu/v47a
  Replies (5) Good night (588) Bad night (1038)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us... http://tfl.nu/7rab
  Replies (0) Good night (605) Bad night (239)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day http://tfl.nu/szgm
  Replies (4) Good night (495) Bad night (271)

Randomize