More tranny stories later!
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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