dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
