What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
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