i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize