Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Its about making memories worth repressing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Randomize