so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
