Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize